Crazy Weather

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Hmmm, this doesn’t look like my order for a smoky quartz palm stone from Sage Goddess. At first, I thought maybe someone had bought this for me…but it’s the same tracking code as my “smoky quartz palm stone”. But this is clearly NOT that. Instead, this is the “Shamanic Journey Trio”. So I’ve reached out to Sage Goddess to let them know they screwed up an order. But I’m telling ya right now, I will not be paying for the shipping to send this package back. That Leopard Skin Jasper sphere is HEAVY.

So fun times at work. I got paid for an hour of sitting in the “safe zone” hallway during a Tornado Warning. Other than that, it was just scanning and tagging projectors. I got 146 done today, even with the hour of paid hallway time. Lots of rain and thunder and some high winds, but the tornadoes didn’t touch down in my city. I’ve heard reports of tornadoes in other nearby cities, but haven’t heard anything official.

In happier news, I finally got my special order of moose antlers set up AND paid for today! Woohoo! So…progress. Yay! Just waiting for them to ship the antlers. Still chomping at the bit here. I want to get started on this project and yet, I’m still waiting on all the supplies! ::sighs::

I think I may have figured out what I’ll do for the god artwork….though, I need to watch some beading and/or quilling videos just to make sure. I’m thinking of beading (or quilling) a deer silhouette on green leather that I would then hang from an elk spike antler. I would tell the Coven/High Priestess it was my god artwork, but once I got it home and hung up in my sacred space, it would be for Elen of the Ways or any of the other antlered female spirits.

Once again, the Satanic Temple is doing the Good Work. They’ve officially announced that Indiana’s law that you have to bury or cremate fetus remains goes against their religious freedom. They’ve even published a template letter for people to fill out and give to their doctors to exempt them from this law. And a huge congrats to the Satanic Temple finally gaining its IRS-approved religious organization recognition.

Bones & Oils

written: May 28

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It has arrived! My resin crow skull from the Five Forges in Italy arrived today and it is gorgeous! And the black feather they attached to it is just perfect. This is exactly what I had in mind to use for the Harpies’ Ladder. Now’s, it’s just a matter of deciding if I’m going to stain the rose cane pieces or paint them or what. And then cutting them the size I want and laying out the beads in a manner I like. Then, just gotta string it all together and hang it up! ::smiles::

And I finally heard back from the Furriers – they’ll be able to do the 10 slices of moose antler no problem. This is the photo they sent me to make sure the 10 were what I was wanting:



Now I’m just waiting for them to create the private listing, and purchase! It’s a little bit more expensive than I was hoping, but not terrible.

So today was the first day back at the Summer Tech Job. Man that 7 am came wayyyyy too early for my tastes. ::laughs:: And then it was a very boring day, so that didn’t help my sleepiness one bit. But hey, I won’t complain. I got quite a bit of journaling done. And I know the crazy days will soon be upon me, so I’m enjoying a quiet, boring day, that I’m getting paid to just sit around.

My oil trade with Corinne W. arrived today. I traded my bottles of Sirius and Armor for her bottles of III (Three) and the ultra-rare Sage Goddess Anointing oil. Woohoo! I am stoked to now have back up bottles of both of those oils, as they are my favorites. So, so happy. ::smiles::

Bingo

written:  May 27

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New thing I’m trying in my BaBuJo (Bastardized Bullet Journal). Maybe this way I’ll actually DO the things on my list instead of just writing a list and then promptly ignoring it.

I’m tempted to make one for each month now. ::chuckles:: Would be a good way to keep me on track with my various goals and what not. Also would be a good way to keep up with cleaning as well. This may become my new best BaBuJo layout yet.

We had a nice, quiet Memorial Day here at the house. We did venture out to Lowe’s. Our oven is going out, so we are getting a new one delivered on Friday, along with a new range hood as well. And I got the eyelet screws I’ll need for the upcoming goddess crafty project. We also looked at blinds for the three windows that are almost impossible to get to. But first, we really should get those windows replaced. Then we can worry about window dressings. ::chuckles::

There is quite the debate going about on how to “properly” celebrate Memorial Day. People are even calling for the government to basically tell people HOW to celebrate. Like, I get it. It’s a day that should be a somber day, given that it’s to honor those who have fallen while in military service to our country. But at the same time, I do not think the government has ANY business telling its population HOW they have to celebrate a particular holiday. That just really rubs me the wrong way. Forced patriotism isn’t patriotism.

Twiddling

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My lily has finally bloomed! She is MASSIVE and gorgeous. ::smiles:: And my roses are gearing up for another round of blooming as well.

Woohoo, I turned in two of my Coven homework assignments. I still have quite a few left to go, but hey, progress is progress. ::chuckles:: Besides, these are topics I don’t really give a shit about. Or they’re ones that I’ve been over a thousand times and don’t care that much about. ::shrugs:: Brutal but true.

I’ve decided to hold off on talking to the High Priestess about Sara the Drama Queen. I will shield myself completely from her and put as much distance between us as possible. I’ll visualize my shield as a mirror, to reflect back all her shit for the Coven to fully see. But I will certainly take precautions to protect myself from her toxicity.

Michael’s is having a sale – all of their strung beads are just $3. I picked up this string of goldstone beads:



I have super vague plans that it will be used in some way for Sekhmet. I’m just not sure in what capacity yet. ::chuckles:: I’m sure I’ll figure it out eventually.

And I picked up some jump rings as well. Those will be used to attach the moose antlers (if I ever get to order them) to the rosary chain. In other crafty news, my resin crow skull is in the next city over. I should have it sometime this week.

Then I can start working on the Harpies’ ladder. I’ll need to cut the dried rose cane down to the lengths I want. Then it’s just a matter of laying out the various beads in a manner that I like and stringing it all together. The resin crow skull is the bottom piece.

While looking through all of the beads at Michael’s, I did come across some glass leaf beads that would work for the God Representation art piece I’m tentatively planning out. I’m going to use one of the shed deer antlers I have and make a beaded sun catcher thing. I would use greens and browns – colors of Cernunnos. Ooooh, I could even get little animal beads to symbolize the animals Cernunnos rules over. Possibly.

OR instead of doing this on an antler…I could finally get around to decorating my spear. That could be an interesting turn of events. Hmmmm, luckily, I have some time to ponder of this. For now, just sitting here twiddling my thumbs, waiting to buy the moose antler slices. So I can then sit and wait for all my crafty supplies to arrive. THEN hopefully I can actually get around to CREATING something. ::smiles::

Hecate's Gift

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A charm from the previous ritual with the Coven. I keep it on my journal, as a daily reminder of what I’m working towards. I do plan to stitch it to the elastic band, or to attach it to the spell candle I have going.

I received notification that the rosary chain has shipped. Woohoo! Now if I can just get the Furries to get off their ass and set up the Moose Antler slices sale that I want, I could get to rocking and rolling here. But then again, it is Memorial Day weekend, so I’m trying my damnedest to cut them some slack. I mean, I still have a month or so before this art project is “due”, so I’m trying my best to not be too terribly impatient.

Mom text me today to tell me she had to put Winston, her beloved pug, down earlier today. My heart goes out to her. That seriously was her baby boy and he was her great protector. I don’t think she love any other pet we’ve had as much as she loved Winston. So now I won’t be going down to her place to puppy-sit. Which is fine. I have plenty of things I need to do here. I want to do something nice for my Mom, to mark Winston’s passing. But I’m not going to say anything more than that, as she does have access to my blog. No spoiling the surprise. ::smiles::

I re-mailed April’s surprise package, complete with apartment number now. ::chuckles:: She should get that by Thursday. And I mailed back the GAP jeans that were insanely too long, so hopefully I’ll get my money back on that purchase soon.

I need to finalize Annette’s goody box and reply to her letter soon. And I still have the Mug surprise that I haven’t gotten around to packing and mailing yet. This year has really been quite the kick in the teeth and I haven’t had nearly enough ME time to get things like this done.

Tomorrow, the plan is to do a few homework assignments and then focus on clearing off my old “art” table. I want to set it up for art journaling as I’ve got the itch to do that again. And I’m feeling the itch to start an official Book of Shadows again. But I think for now, I’ll focus on doing that in my Witch’s Journal. I plan to fill that bitch up completely. ::chuckles:: I’ve been looking at all the beautiful journals on Pinterest, so now I want to fill up as many as I can. ::smiles::

Cleetus VS Crows

written: May 24

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1 crow in the tree
1 crow getting its ass kicked by a VERY pissed off Cleetus (Mockingbird).
Cleetus goes on to drive off both crows out of the neighborhood.

I had so many fabulous plans for today – my first day of Summer Break. Instead, I took the most amazing 2.5 hour nap with Josey. ::laughs:: I did get some pen pals written to, and received April’s surprise box back (I left off the apartment number, so I’ll fix that and mail it again). I also did 3 loads of laundry, so today wasn’t a complete bust.

Oh, and I walked Josey this morning and turned in my “application” to lead the Documentation class again at the after school orientation in August (just in case I haven’t landed a library job by then). I did some work in my Witch’s Journal. I’m up to mid-February, which is when my grandmother passed, so I understand the writer’s block against working in it right now. I’m doing what I can and taking whatever breaks I require.

And since I’ll be down at my Mom’s Sunday through Monday, I am planning on doing the bulk of my Coven homework then. I had the great idea today to just video record my answers and then I can type it up from there. And then I thought “Fuck it. Why not just send the video answers directly to my High Priestess?” It certainly would make it easier to catch up and then I can type them up at a later date to add to my Coven journal. ::smiles::

Other than that, I’ve just been lounging around and RELAXING. It’s so nice. I could get used to this! ::laughs::

Final Day

written: May 23

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Christina, one of my awesome aides, surprised me with this today! ::laughs:: A case of the Mocha Frappuccinos that I drink EVERY DAY at work. ::grins:: I feel so loved. She’s the aide that I was training to hopefully take over my campus this coming year.

All in all, it was a pretty damn good day. Kaitlyn (high school aide) wasn’t there, but we actually got a sub (which is pretty much unheard of) – Trevor. He’s a great sub. I got some really nice gift cards (Starbucks and Amazon) and some REALLY nice cards. Quite a few of the parents are aware that this is quite possibly my last year, so I got a lot of hugs and a LOT of thanks and praise for all the time I’ve spent with their kiddos. The Rodriguez’s gave me THE sweetest card (their oldest was the one that wanted the pink safari hat), thanking me for all that I did for their two kids, along with a $50 Amazon gift card. I’ll definitely keep the card they wrote me. It seriously damn near made me cry. ::chuckles:: I will definitely be emailing that family and thanking them for their kind words and generosity.

I’ve figured out what I’m going to make for my “Goddess Representation” craft – a moon phase wall hanging. I’ll paint the phases on 9 slices of moose antler. Then I’ll string them on a length of rosary chain along the top of my altar. I’m actually really excited about this project. It’s one I’ve wanted to do for a while now, but just haven’t had the motivation to actually DO it.

I’ve already ordered the rosary chain. It just sucks that it’s coming from China, but it is significantly cheaper. I just hope they ship soon. And I’ve contacted the etsy shop that I hope to get the moose antler slices through. Hopefully they will set up a reserve listing for me, for the 10 antler slices (an extra one to practice on before doing the real deal) and I can get those ordered asap. I need to pick up another package of eyelets for the antler slices. The package I have only has 8 eyelets. The eyelets will be used to attach the antler slices to the rosary chain. I’m super excited to get started on this project. It just sucks having to WAIT for the supplies to arrive. ::chuckles::

And, because I know it’s coming, I’m thinking of what project I can do for the “God Representation” craft. I’m struggling with that one because the god doesn’t play much of a role in my Craft. There are one two that have hung around for more than a year – Cernunnos and Set. But again, they don’t play major roles and I don’t even have any altar space set aside for them. So I’m trying to figure out a craft that I could say represented the god, but that would meld well into my personal practice. ::chuckles:: I’m definitely thinking of decorating one of the shed deer antlers I have. Or maybe mounting the skull plate and antler set I have (from one of my brother’s deer) and decorating that?

Sleepy & Zip Ties

written: May 22

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A very exhausted Wolfie with a sweet Josey pup standing guard in the window.

Today was our End of the Year pizza party with the students at the after school program AND the elementary’s talent show. Yeah, lots of moving parts for all of that. So even though it was just our standard 4 hours, I am BEAT.

It was pretty good actually. We had 69 of our 70 students there. Tomorrow is our CRAZY day (8 hour day AND the last day of the school year). But honestly, today was pretty calm, all things considered.

I randomly came across the Ziptie Jewelry etsy shop today via their silver halo crown.



Now, I’ve seen crowns like this that cost $400+ and I’ve wanted one for years. But this one is made of ZIP TIES. Like, are you shitting me?



Soooo, I think I may have found my summer crafty project. I really want to try to make one of these for myself. Just three supplies needed – zip ties (about 100), a thin metal headband, and silver paint. That’s it!

I was telling my husband about it and he was like “But why do you need it?” I don’t NEED it, I WANT it. And I’m gonna make it. ::chuckles:: He wasn’t being critical, just trying to be hyper logical at that time. ::laughs:: Once he realized that it was a creative thing/want, he understood.

I plan to wear it for my own personal esbat rituals for sure. I’m sure I could come up with some sort of costuming idea for Halloween utilizing the crown as well. And I’m thinking of making a golden one as well, to honor Sekhmet. I KNOW that the golden one would look incredibly BAD ASS with the red kimono robe that has golden glitter flames on it (that Jennifer K. made for me years ago).

I’ll need to get a foam head to put the crown on when I’m not wearing it (IF it turns out well enough to keep). It would look incredibly badass to have a silver crown and a gold crown flanking Godzilla at the top of my altar. ::laughs:: I’d spray paint the heads black or get black velvet heads for the crowns to sit atop.

Gift Horse

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This is where I’m currently hanging my graduation tassel.

You know it was a crazy stressful day when you remember at 6 pm that you brought your snake up to visit the students. Yeah, so that happened. I brought Leviathan up to visit the students and then totally forgot about her until 6 pm. By that point, almost all of the students had left. Oh well. Did spur me to clean up her tank a bit before I put her back in, so that’s a win.

The reason my mind was so out of it was that they were practicing their talent show today in the cafeteria until 5 pm. ::sighs:: Thankfully though, the students were really well behaved. Like, freakishly, well behaved. But hey, I’m not about to look a gift horse in the mouth. I will take that gift and be deeply grateful for it.

Just two more days. Just gotta make it through Wednesday – the day we are having our end of the year party AND that they are having their talent show (at 6 pm). Then Thursday. Lord help me that day. It’s an early release day – which means an EXTRA LONG day for me.

Stressed

written: May 20

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Adorable little mushroom in my front yard that I spotted when I took Josey out for a walk.

I had a quick nightmare last night, that a red gremlin was coming for me. I even physically reacted, striking out in my sleep as I was waking up. And my first thought was “Fuck you, Sara”. So needless to say, I don’t see us becoming bosom buddies anytime soon. It’s a good thing I sleep alone. Would have sucked to hit my husband or Josey-pup (she probably would have bit me if I’d punched her while she was sleeping – don’t blame her for that possibility). ::chuckles::

Today was an awesome mail day.
My order of blue vervain (herb for a banishing incense I’ll be making soon), my graduation tassel, and my Lazurite stone all arrived today, along with letters from pen pals Wendy and Amanda.

The Lazurite stone ended up being much bigger than I thought it was going to be, but it’s such a lovely blue gray color:



I’m thinking it may go on the Harpies’ side of the altar given its steely-blue coloration reminds me of storm clouds.

JoAnn’s surprise arrived today and she was kind enough to take a video of her opening the package. It was a necklace from Luna Blue Boutique. I’ve had the necklace for a while now, but it didn’t feel like it was MINE. So I was thinking of selling it, but then I had the inspiration to send it to JoAnn instead. And when I was writing down the metaphysical properties of the two stones used to make the necklace, it just seemed like it was meant to go to her. ::smiles::

April’s surprise is being returned to me. I didn’t have her apartment number written on the package (oops!). SO, as soon as it arrives back here, I’ll update the address and mail it again! ::laughs::

AND I found someone on the Sage Goddess Perfume group that was trading a full bottle of the SG Anointing oil I was talking about a while back. She was interested in two of the perfumes I was offering, so I looked back through what she had to trade and she’s also trading a full bottle of III (3). It’s my current go-to perfume oil. So I’m trading a bottle of Sirus and a bottle of Armor for her bottles of III and SG Anointing oil. Just need to package them up and mail them out on Tuesday.

Work was stressful, but not terrible (thank goodness). We were out of the cafeteria completely due to them setting up for the 5th grade awards and graduation ceremony. But thankfully the rains held off and the kiddos were able to go outside. It was hot and muggy and all around gross, but I am so grateful I have staff that will take the students outside. But all the students were picked up early, and I was headed home before 6:20! I typically hang around and do stuff until 6:30, just to get the full pay, but not today. Today I was like FUCK IT, I’m going home! ::laughs::

Drama Queen & Hecate

written: May 19

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One of three cards I drew last night during our class on the Goddess. This one is from the Goddess Guidance Oracle deck. It’s a deck I’ve had in the past, but have since passed on to someone new. But a timely message.

I’m going to rant here because this shit is seriously pissing me off. I ADORE the Coven…expect for Sara. She’s a fellow Student, and guys. I just fucking CAN’T with this bitch. She is the neediest, whiniest, needs to be the center of attention, always has to one up EVERYONE, little dramatic BITCH in the world. I knew from the get-go that I didn’t like her, I just couldn’t figure out why. It was a gut level HELL NO feeling.

And if what she’s saying is, in fact true, then she is the most easily “possessed” person on the goddamn planet. Right before we were about to head into ritual, she got “possessed” by a gremlin thing. And she was a blubbering mess, talking like a child, and I’m just fucking over it. It’s always something dramatic like this for her EVERY DAMN TIME we are together in group. Previously it was Persephone (the goddess) that possessed her for TWO WEEKS. She is the damsel in distress that always has to have someone save her. Usually it’s her husband, who’s this AMAZING witch (or so she says), that banishes these things out of her, but this time around, our High Priestess did the banishing.

And I’m not saying that unwanted spirits can’t enter people and possess them. But, fuck, if it is happening as much as she claims, you would think she would learn SOMETHING to protect herself. ::rolls her eyes:: But nope. She is JUST now learning how to shield herself.

Man, as soon as she called out to the High Priestess to do a banishing, my personal shields went up and blocked me completely off from her. It was just instinctual. Was she actually possessed by something? Hell if I know. But I realized in that moment WHY I don’t like her. She’s an Energy Vampire – she feeds off the attention and energy from everyone around her.

So that kind of derailed the whole thing for a while. Her husband came and picked her up. We sat and talked about the whole situation (not like about Sara, but about the experience and how it was affecting the group). Then we grounded and re-centered and then went in to ritual. I’m not allowed to talk much about the actual ritual, but damn it was awesome. Hecate was invoked in Her triple aspect. And I realized that I LOVE having our ritual feast IN circle, IN sacred space. Just lovely.

So, now I’m conflicted because I seriously LOVE this Coven. But damn. Sara? I fucking can’t stand her. I’m just trying to figure out a way to bring my concerns to the High Priestess in a manner that doesn’t make me sound like a complete and utter bitch. Wish me luck with that! ::laughs::

PINK

written: May 18

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Woohoo, the pink safari hat arrived! ::chuckles:: Enjoy it now, as this is pretty much the only pink thing you will find me wearing anytime soon.

But seriously, it’s a sweet ass hat. But I would get it in khaki or grey. Definitely not pink. ::chuckles::

I spent most of the day working in my Witch’s Journal. I haven’t touched it in AGES – far longer than I care to admit – but logged 10 entries in it today. Guess that Scorpio Full Moon lit a fire under my ass. ::laughs:: I’m working to get it caught up and then to set aside regular time once a week to work in it, so that hopefully I don’t fall this far behind in it again. Wish me luck with that, because I’m amazing as making plans. I just suck so bad at actually following through. ::laughs::

I randomly decided to hit Hobby Lobby. I’m feeling very restless, so I figured I would do the least amount of damage to my finances at Hobby Lobby. I’m super picky with my crafting supplies, so unless it’s damn near perfect, I won’t buy it. So with that said, I came home with a strand of Larvikite beads (I know, I swear I’m addicted to that stone) and a strand of Labradorite chips – both were on sale, so I paid less for the two strands than the Larvikite beads originally cost (less than $7 for both). Woohoo for me! I’m planning to use these when I create the Harpies’ charm/ladder/devotional thing. I seriously need to come up with a better name for it. ::laughs:: I just don’t know what to call it. Maybe once I make it, I’ll figure out what to call it. Or I’ll just keep calling it the charm/ladder thing (far more likely).

Tomorrow is Coven class and full moon ritual. I’m looking forward to it (other than being around Sara). I’m trying to tell myself to be less judgmental and more accepting. I’m trying to extend to her the same courtesy that I would want to receive. But, man, I’m struggling really hard with that. I don’t like the fact that the first impression you give me is almost impossible to change, or that once I’ve decided how I feel about you, that’s it. There’s no going back, there’s no do over, there’s almost never a way to change my mind (be it good or bad – I’ve been way too forgiving of Toxic Friends/Lovers in the past). I dunno. Maybe I should listen to my gut on this one and just avoid her. Maybe my gut is telling me something is very off about this particular woman and that I need to stay far away from her. She does seem to be a drama magnet and thrives being the center of attention – the polar opposite of myself. Hmmm.

Safari Hats

written:  May 17

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My basil boy and his little baby.

I mailed out the two packages. They should arrive on Monday. Super excited about that.

Saw the news earlier today that Tardar Sauce, aka Grumpy Cat, passed away today. Rest in peace dear, Grumpy Cat. You gave us so many amazing memes over the years. We will always be grateful for that.

I turned in two of my Coven assignments. Woohoo for me. I just have about 14 more assignments to do and then I’m all caught up. ::laughs:: I don’t think it’s quite 14, but I am seriously behind. REALLY behind on my assignments.

Since I’m going to be at my Mom’s house Memorial Day weekend – I’m babysitting her two puppers – I am hoping I can get a lot of the assignments done then. ::chuckles:: I’ve done most of the readings already, so really, I just need to apply my butt to the chair and write up the assignments.

Hilarious thing at work – I had told Everett (student) at the beginning of the year, that if he killed 10 flies, I would buy him a safari hat. Well, he finally killed fly #9 and #10 today. So I hopped on Amazon and looked up safari hats. He requested a pretty cool one in PINK. Granted, this is the student that during the colder months, would rummage through lost and found specifically to find a pink sweater or sweatshirt to wear. He likes it because it’s hilarious. And the more the kids scoffed about him wearing pink, the more he wore it. ::laughs::

So I rushed home and called my Mom and told her I had an unusual request for her. I would send her the link for the pink safari hat and I needed her to buy it using her Amazon Prime, so we could get it asap. ::laughs:: I should have the hat TOMORROW! Everett is going to be so excited on Monday!

Migraine Mush

written: May 15

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A shot from one of our huge boxes of packing peanuts.
I packed up two goody packages to mail out tomorrow – one to April and one to JoAnn. April’s was SUPPOSED to be mailed out in time for her birthday (May 4th), but I missed the shit out of that (due to a very weak paycheck). So, since this paycheck was a good one (ie, I can pay all my bills, put some into savings, and have a little left over to play with), I am mailing her package (and JoAnn’s) out tomorrow. I can’t wait for them to get them. ::big happy smile::

I battled a mid-level migraine all day. It finally went away around 8 pm. Luckily, today was the student’s Choir and Safety Patrol parties, so quite a few of them were gone until 5 pm. And then, since Kaitlyn (aide) had to leave at 5, we got Emily H. as our sub. Love her so much. She’s such a great sub and a great person.

I received a letter today from Becki (pen-pal). She’s a hoot and a half. She sent a blank copy of the pen-pal survey that I filled out in the previous letter to her. I’ll make copies to send to my various pen-pals. ::smiles:: And, besides, Becki writes the most entertaining letters.

I had a flash of inspiration when I was taking a shower today (isn’t that pretty much where inspiration always shows up?). I’m taking these daily photos for 1001 days. And the plan was to make them into a photobook through Shutterfly, but that shit gets SUPER expensive. So why not make them into a book that I can then have printed and bound at the library that I did my practicum hours at. It will be world’s cheaper that way as well. Besides, it’s not like all of my daily photos have been stellar ones, worthy of awards. ::chuckles:: And well, I’ve been wanting to try out their self-contained book press ever since I heard about it. This just gives me the excuse to do so. ::grins:: Kind of looking forward to that.

So yeah, I’ll need to download their formatted version of Word and start the LONG process of gathering up all the photos and writing up the notes to go with them. I’m rather excited at the prospect of doing this. Should keep me entertained/busy for a while.

Just one WEEK left of the after school program. And let me tell you, the staff, ME, and the students are ALL ready for summer break. I seriously wish we didn’t have a whole ‘nother week. But next week is all about the various programs and end of year parties, and then we are DONE. Whew!

Journals & Conservatives

written: May 15

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Completed journal on the left, new journal on the right. I’m so glad my new journal FINALLY arrived. I know I should have ordered it sooner, so really I only have myself to blame for it taking so long to arrive. But I’m happy it finally arrived. Granted, it isn’t the same as the pale gray one, but I like it and it will work.

Silly that I’ve been waiting on this journal arrive, and then once it arrives, I can’t bring myself to write in it. ::laughs:: I totally froze up. So I ended up copying over my little summer time plans/goals. That’s my first entry in my new journal. Seems perfect. ::smiles::

This was shared on Facebook and I laughed out loud, scaring poor Josey Pup.



And honestly, the more I thought about it, the more true it was. ::laughs::
Seriously though, Keith was the absolute WORST sexual partner I EVER had, and he is a loud and proud, self-proclaimed “Red Elephant” (a super conservative Republican). And David, my husband, who seriously is my absolute BEST sexual partner EVER, is a liberal. Honestly, I think he was a liberal deep down inside, but behaved like a Republican in the beginning just to appease his father.

Seriously, the dramatic conservative turn our country is taking right now is scaring the crap out of me. So many States are trying their best to completely outlaw abortion…even going as far to lay criminal charges against women who get abortions (regardless if they get the abortion in THAT state, or go to another state) and against the doctors that perform abortions. ::shakes her head:: But of course, nothing is even mention about the MEN who helped the women get PREGNANT in the first place. They should be held accountable too, as they are HALF the reason the woman is pregnant! But of course not, because only the women should be punished here. ::shakes her head:: Ok, I have to stop. I’m too angry/upset about this shit.

Beast

written:  May 14

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What the wolf wax seal looks like when you use it (ignore the fact that I did it sideways accidentally). ::chuckles:: I will definitely look into getting some more sealing wax in some fun colors soon. There’s an etsy store that has little wax stars you melt into a spoon that come in a huge array of colors.

Well, all my grades are in and my final, cumulative GPA for my Master’s degree is a 3.666. ::dies laughing:: Of course it would be a 666. ::shakes her head:: I joked on Facebook that it makes sense, given that this was a BEAST of a degree to get. ::laughs::

And a few days ago, I had reposted this meme:



Guess I took it to heart! ::laughs:: BUT, this means I graduate WITH HONORS bitches!!! Cum laude to be precise. ALMOST makes me want to do the graduation ceremony, but waiting until December just isn’t that appealing to me.

I got to looking around for a place I could purchase a graduation tassel. I found GradShop.com that had them for just $3.95…..plus $14.95 shipping. That was the cheapest shipping option they had available. I even emailed them to inquire if this was right. Needless to say, I took my punk ass to eBay, found the exact same tassel for $3.95 and FREE shipping, so I bought it. AND, it’s slated to arrive before the GradShop would have, even if I had shelled out $15 in shipping. Absurd. Beyond absurd.

I ship the perfume oils (like the one in yesterday’s daily photo) in swaps, and even then, I don’t pay more than $4 for shipping. And I’m pretty sure the perfume oils weigh more than the damn tassel…so why the $15 shipping charge? Are rare Tibetan homing pigeons delivering it to me? like, I’m just boggled at this. Still. ::chuckles::

Eval with Esmeralda

written: May 13

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The freebie perfume that came with my Sage Goddess order today. And I actually like it, so huge win for me. And of course, Godzilla approves. ::grins and laughs::

And I just realized I never said what yesterday’s photo – my lil spinach plants are making spinach leaves that actually look like spinach! I’m rather excited! AND my lavender is starting to sprout.

I had my End of Year Evaluation with Esmeralda. It was surprisingly positive. Like, I’m almost suspicious of it, but I’m not questioning it. But my bullshit meter did go off when she said I had awesome attendance because I’m always here – um, I missed more than my allotted 5 paid days this year due to school. But hey, you wanna say I have outstanding attendance, I won’t challenge ya. ::chuckles:: I will take that win because it will look good on my resume later on so I can get a different job.

But yeah, I’m not buying what they are selling (they = bosses). It just feels like after the shit show that was the employee satisfaction survey went down, that they are in this mad rush to prove just how AWESOME they are? It just reeks of a PR stunt to me. Or maybe I’m just overly suspicious of them…because I know they suck. ::laughs:: Oh well, all the more reason to do what I can to get the hell out of dodge as soon as possible.

Still waiting for my new journal to arrive. I should have purchased it when I was down to just 3 pages left in the current journal. I dunno why, but I just COULDN’T make myself spend $10 on the journal. Which, I KNOW is ridiculous, because I’ve spent 6 times that on a single journal (more times that I care to admit to right now) in the past. ::shakes her head:: I don’t understand the rules my brain plays by at times. Hell, and the few times I HAVE figured out the rules, the brain goes and changes EVERYTHING.

Crafty

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So I finally used up one of the jar candles I bought last year. Originally I was planning to just clean it and recycle it, but as I was walking up to my room to do so, I thought…how awesome would it be to make a big, giant spell candle with this large jar? Like, I could specifically make one for protection, or peace, or creativity, or prosperity. I could tuck in a lot of herbs and specific gemstones. I could even add in specific oils and maybe even color the wax to fit as well. I could write a specific sigil and tape it to the jar, either on the side or on the bottom of the jar. And the more I use and reuse it for the same purpose, the money energy that will get stocked up in it.

So yeah, now I need to hit some thrift stores and get some cheap pots and pans and a double boiler to use solely for candle making.

And of course, I got sucked into Etsy, looking at various Sekhmet themed things. I’ve come up with an idea for a lovely necklace I want to make for Her area of my altar. Which, led to me tumbling so far down the eBay hole. ::laughs:: I haven’t bought or bid on anything. I’m just in the research (aka OBSESSION) stage and I’m checking everything out.

Which, I stumbled across these beads:



Don’t they look like little suns??? I’m not sure how I’m going to use those, but I know I’m going to use them in something. ::laughs:: Again…haven’t BOUGHT anything yet. Just scheming right now. I have white ones like this that look just like little moons. I’ll probably end up using those as part of the Spirit Wolf’s devotional piece. Maybe a devotional piece for Artemis as well?

I’m seriously digging this high creativity period. Now, if only I had the unlimited funds to pay for all this creativity! ::chuckles::

Which, maybe this will light a fire under my ass to go through all my stuff and see what I can sell. I need to get the items photographed and listed and see if I can make some fun money off of ‘em. ::chuckles:: Whatever money I make off the various Pagan items I sell will be automatically funneled into my new Pagan crafting fund.

I’m currently creating a list of things I want to do this summer. I have a number of little projects here right now that I could be doing without spending a dime. I don’t want this summer to pass me by and I look up and realize I haven’t done a damn thing. So you know me, the Goal Making Queen here. I’m making a list of fabulous things I want to do.

A Cocoon Day

written: May 11



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Annette surprised me with a massive goodie box today. Among the various goodies was this wolf wax seal for my letters. I’ve already used it to seal a letter to Australia. Love it and I will certainly get some more wax once this one is all used up. So much fun.

So it’s looking like I will have an 87 for the Resource Management class – up from the 86. So that’s a nice surprise. And the Practicum class is simply a Pass/No Pass class. I’m just impatient to know what my final cumulative GPA is. Honestly, that’s all I care about at this point.

Fabulous, rainy today this morning. I kept waking up, hearing the rain, and then going right back to sleep. I was perfectly cocooned in my bed and didn’t emerge until almost noon. :chuckles::

After that, we just hung out and watched movies for the bulk of the day. We did venture out. I needed to print some of the otter photos to send to a pen pal and David was wanting some specific pens. But other than that, we were complete bums and it was amazing. ::smiles::

---

Mail Art

written:  May 10

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Another amazing mail art piece from my pen-pal, Sorrow. I received a letter from her and from Cassie today. I seriously love my pen pals.

Much less shitty day today. I can still smell the Palo santo and anointing oil anytime I walk into my room. Love it. I seriously have to get my hands on some more of the anointing oil or really start working on testing out recipes. That might be a good project for the summer. And I want to make my own candles as well.

So wax, oils, gemstone chips, herbs, and candle wicks. Sounds like the beginning of a seriously fun summer to me. ::chuckles::

I think all of this witchy creativity spark is due in part to Taz (from the Hearth group) finally opening up her own witchy shop in Spain. I’m so excited for her and am loving the snippets she sharing with the group. She’s doing little videos to show her new shop space. And then after she got it painted. And then her big gemstone haul and most recently her herbal and tea haul. I’m am so happy and excited for her.

Plus, I’ve been hanging out on Pinterest again and coming up with some great creative ideas. I’ve been sketching some of them out in my little sketchbook. And while my sketches aren’t award winning by any stretch of the imagination, I can tell what I’m drawing, and really? That’s all that matters. ::chuckles:: While I couldn’t mind learning how to sketch better, I’m pretty ok with my ability right now.

Though I definitely do plan to pick up some beginner drawing/sketching books this summer and playing around with that as well. I’m seriously enjoying just doing what I can right now. And honestly, it’s because of one my students, Kalli, has been just sketching at the after school program. I like that she isn’t the best artist we have at the after school program, but she doesn’t let that phase her one bit. I need more of that in my life. So honestly, I’m grateful for this lesson. ::smiles:: Kids are the best teachers sometimes.

MOOD

written: May 09

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Sweet baby Jesus Christ, I’m about to burn this mother fucker down!!!!!

My post, straight from Facebook:

Today can go take a flying leap into hell for all I care.

It started shitty. It got exponentially more and more shitty as the day progressed.
Today’s photo is me, smoking a cigarette and flipping the bird, but I’m not posting it here because I cannot handle someone lecturing me on “how bad cigarettes are for my health”. I would just block that person(s) at this point.

So seriously, don’t post telling me SHIT I ALREADY KNOW or sharing some fluffy woo-woo Oh Be Positive Bullshit. I will delete the damn comment and I will block you. I don’t care how long we’ve been friends.

And then almost exactly an hour later, I posted this:

Ok, I’m feeling a bit better. I blasted some Poe and did some rage cleaning in my room.

So all the laundry has been folded, hung up, AND put away!
I’ve cleaned my new desk/altar/sacred space area. SCRUBBED the sticker residue off of it. AND I went ahead and spiritually cleansed and blessed it, so now it’s actually ready for me to start USING.

So yeah….today sucked so much ass. It’s almost like we compressed a YEAR’S worth of bullshit and crap into ONE 24-hour period. I damn near rage-quit my job.

BUT, I did get my new-to-me desk cleaned. FINALLY. I physically cleaned it with Clorix wipes (I have a ton of those from work). I used Goo-Gone to scrub some sticker residue off and then cleaned it again with Clorix wipes. Then I cleansed it with the smoke of Palo santo wood – I seriously love this stuff. Smells worlds better than sage. And then I blessed the altar with Sage Goddess Anointing oil.

I LOVE the Sage Goddess Anointing oil. I bought it years ago – $9 for a small vial of it. But man, it smells so amazing. But she hasn’t offered it again since I bought it back in 2014. I went ahead and emailed Sage Goddess, asking if they are ever going to offer it again. seriously, if they do, I’m buying 3 or so for myself and begging all my friends and family to buy a vial for me for my birthday or Christmas. ::laughs:: That way I’ll be set for a good while. I love this oil THAT much. Or if I could get my lil paws on the recipe for it, I would whip up a batch for myself and send some to a shit-ton of Pagan pals. ::laughs:: And then I would also sell this oil.

Now I kind of want to try out all the various anointing oil recipes out there on the inter-webs. Maybe one of those is close to what Sage Goddess has. Or who knows, maybe I’ll find one that I like even better. ::chuckles::

Flexible

written: May 08

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Some gorgeous “blue sapphire” orchids I saw at Tom Thumb today when I went to pick up my thyroid prescription. Sucks that this med has gone up in price for me…but thankfully the monthly fee for internet went down, so I think it’s all balanced out in the end.

It’s been beautifully rainy and stormy here all day. I tried to take a nap with Josey but it was too cold in David’s room, so I eventually gave up on that. Plus it seemed like everyone and their dog was wanting to text me right then as well. ::shrugs:: Oh well. No nap.

Work crap is piling up as we are getting close to the end of the school year. All the various performances and award ceremonies and what not. We’ve still got to figure out for sure what day we’ll do our End of the Year party for the after school program. Then I need to write up the parent letter about it and get that going soon.

I love that Liam still stops by a few times a week to give me a hug before going to his new after school program. I got to show him photos of the Godzilla toy David bought me – Liam was sufficiently impressed. He’s a fellow Godzilla lover. ::smiles:: Man, I miss having that kiddo in my program. He truly is awesome.

Not much else to babble about. I’m in a holding pattern at this point about the college semester. The end of the semester is Friday, so I’ll know by that point what my grades will be. And I’m just going with the flow with the after school program at this point. You have to be flexible this final month, because there is just so much going on. I have all the end of year evaluations done for my staff. Just have to sit down with them and go through it at this point. My end of year evaluation is on Monday. No clue how that’s going to go, as I’ve kind of bucked the system a bit more this year than previously. Almost wish I had the money to do some fun color in my hair as a final bucking, but alas. I be broke right now. I wish I could say that I was choosing to be the bigger man, but it is solely about money. ::laughs:: If I had the money, I would have some fun color. Not even going to lie.

Now, though, I kind of want to look into how hard/easy it is to grow orchids. I wouldn’t mind having some of those in a wide array of colors. But I’ve heard they’re a bit of a pain in the ass to grow….so. Besides, I saw some pretty lilies of some sort at Wal-Mart the other day that both me and my husband liked. Maybe I’ll get a pot or two of those instead.

Birds & Stones

written:  May 07

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My little basil plant has a tiny basil buddy! I did not even see the tiny basil until after I took the photo. This particular basil is part of a prosperity spell my husband did when we first moved into the house (he has done the basil prosperity spell with great success while we were living in the apartment), and this particular basil has re-seeded itself every year thus far. I really should get a copy of the spell from my husband and write it down in my Witch’s Journal.

We have a major storm moving in this evening. I took Josey pup for a second walk this evening (I am getting back into the swing of walking her in the mornings) even though my right eye is attempting to swell shut again (thanks, fuck-ass allergies). The wind and the dark clouds…I just love it. It makes me feel so incredibly alive.

So I already got my grade back on the Final Paper of Doom – 80. Which makes my current grade for the class an 86. I am 100% ok with that. ::laughs:: It is over and done and in the books. Speaking of which, I need to mail back the text book I had for this class (I think I read 2 chapters out of the entire book?) so I don’t get charged for purchasing the book. Hell no. I have better things I would rather spend my money on than that shitty ass book! ::laughs::

I had all these Great Plans for what I would do with my free time, now that I am no longer having to worry about class work. Instead…I nap. A lot. ::laughs:: And I veg out. A lot. I am sure once I get caught up on my proper levels of napping and vegging, I can start working on actual projects I want to do.

Like, I really need to go to the Local Library and have them show me how to use their laser cutter/engraver and their CNC milling machine. Those are the two machines I really want to play with this coming summer. I definitely want to get my Craft on (witch and non-witch alike).

Well….it seems that Leida’s journal is actually on its way back to me? I don’t know why the post office didn’t deliver it to Sharmila. The journal made it all the way to London…but is now coming back to me. ::sighs:: I have never had a journal swap have this big of a hiccup. But I am just DEEPLY thankful the journal isn’t LOST. So as soon as I get it, I will verify with Sharmila that I did put the correct address on it (hopefully the post office will give some indication as to WHY they didn’t deliver it), and I will ship that out to Sharmila ASAP. Which means, I should probably also get my friend’s surprise gift all packed up and ready to mail as well. You know, that whole “two birds, one stone” deal. ::chuckles::

Inked Goddess Creation box

written:  May 06

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My Inked Goddess Creation monthly box arrived today – theme is Animal Magick. So of course you know I had to buy it. It is so cool. I am very pleased with it.

This month’s box contained:
- Animal Spirits Knowledge Cards deck
- Animal Magick Meditation Balm
- Gemstone animal carving (which is a PERFECT addition to a gift I will be sending to a friend soon, so I’m super thrilled about that and keeping silent on what the animal is because I don’t want to tip of said friend)
- Raven Animal Magick Votive
- Familiar Totem hand-dipped ceremonial stick incense
- Familiar protection witch bottle kit
- And a porcupine quill

I am thinking I may do an unboxing video of this one and last month’s box (Storm Witch) for the Hearth group. One of the ladies in there (can’t recall WHO exactly), was wanting suggestions for good monthly boxes and I suggested Inked Goddess Creations. I could do a quickie video over those two boxes to show her (and the other members) what to expect from Inked Goddess Creations. Next month’s theme is Sacred Grove, and I’m not interested in that. I’ll wait and see what all will be in the box later on this month, when Inked Goddess Creations does little sneak peaks.

The big news for today is that I finished and submitted my final paper for the Resource Management class, so I am officially DONE with my final semester! Woohoo! And of course the professor nit-picked the paper to death and only gave me 80% on it…but it keeps my grade at a high B and that’s all that friggin’ matters. I should have 100% total for the Practicum class, so hopefully this will boost my GPA a bit. It’s currently at a 3.72 (cumulative). I would like to graduate with a 3.75, but hey, I’m good.

To celebrate, I purchased a resin cast of a crow’s skull. ::laughs:: It’s coming from Italy, so it cost a bit to ship, but it’s NICE. And it’s for a devotional piece I’m making for the Harpies, so I’m excited for it to arrive and I can begin work on it.

Beltane

written:  May 05

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One of the cards I drew at Class this evening – Thetis from the Goddess Wisdom deck.

We also had our Coven’s Beltane ritual this evening. Now generally speaking, I am not a fan of Beltane. I don’t care for fairies. I don’t care for the overt sexual nature of the sabbat (or at least what it has become in the modern Pagan tradition). But I have to say, this one was awesome.

Luna wrote and performed the ritual. And seriously, I friggin’ adore her. She is from New Orleans and has that “don’t fuck with me, I will end your world” vibe. ::laughs:: She is also a fan of serpents (she had a gorgeous serpent necklace on this evening) and has a “bone witch” vibe to her which just attracts me like a moth to a flame. ::chuckles::

She invoked Gaia and Cernunnos – which was nice, because Cernunnos is one of the very few male deities I work with and one of the ONLY male deities that has stuck around for more than a year or so. On the altar, she had a green 7-day candle for Gaia and a red 7-day candle for Cernunnos. In the cauldron, she had a gold 7-day candle to symbolize their union. To light that one she took two matches and lit one from Gaia’s candle and the other from Cernunnos’ candle, and then used the two matches to light the center candle.

We each pulled a white ribbon from the cauldron. On this ribbon we wrote a few things we want to bring into fruition. And then Luna had created simple Beltane candles for each of us in colors of either red, green, or gold. She got a 7-day candle, and tied a cinnamon stick to it with some fabric along with a single match. With our individual matches, we lit them from the union candle and used it to then light our own Beltane candle. I ended up wrapped my ribbon around the candle so I wouldn’t lose it, and a number of the Coven-mates remarked what a great idea it was and did the same. We are to tie the ribbons to a tree eventually, though, honestly, I may just keep it wrapped around the candle. Or I may wrap it around my spear, if I ever get my new altar cleaned and set up. ::laughs::

The sad news of the day is that this was Azza’s last day with us. She recently started a new job in Austin and just doesn’t have the time to continue with the Coven. I am super bummed that she’s leaving, though thrilled for her new job. She was one of my favorites from the student group.

In other news, I cannot STAND Sara in the student group. She seriously just rubs me the wrong way on a gut level. I have managed to ensure I do not sit next to her during class, but got stuck next to her during ritual. She is just a super attention hog in my opinion and I just do not like her. At all. Like she starts talking and I can feel a snarl growing in my throat – it is just almost instinctual. She speaks and my bullshit meter goes off the charts with her. ::deep breath:: I really am trying to give her the benefit of the doubt here and trying to be more accepting. But tonight, it was everything I could do not just growl at her anytime she even looked my direction.

Getting Close

written:  May 04
 
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My spinach and onions are already sprouting! And I noticed two tomato plants are sprouting as well (seeds planted last year). Still nothing on the lavender, but I am doing my best to be patient. Wish me luck with that! ::laughs:: Patience is not a virtue I possess most of the time.

I spent the bulk of my day working on the Final Paper of Doom for the Resource Management class. I am about 80% done and it is 19 pages along already. So friggin’ BORING. It was boring the first time I wrote the various papers for this class. I swear, it has gotten exponentially MORE boring going back over it all. I just keep telling myself, this is the last class, this is the last class, this is the last class. As long as I pass this class (which I will), I won’t ever have to take this class EVER AGAIN. I have just got to push through to the end of this and see it all the way through.

I have already picked out my “reward” for when I finish this paper and turn it in – I am buying a beautiful resin cast of a crow’s skull. It will be part of a devotional piece / witch’s ladder thing for the Harpies. And since it is a VERY nice cast and coming from Italy, it is a bit pricier than I would like. But, that is my carrot I am dangling in front of my own face to get myself through this final hurdle.

I will need to figure out the rest of the logistics of this little project of mine, once the skull itself arrives. The size of the skull will dictate how long the witch’s ladder will be. Then I will have to play around with how long and how many pieces of dried rose cane I will use. I saved a cutting from last year, and it has been curing all year in my little herb window in the kitchen. I will also need to decide if I am going to paint said canes and if so, then what color(s) I will use. THEN, I will need to drill holes in the canes for the cord to pass through. And I know I will be using the oval larvikite beads I bought 2 years ago, but I need some other beads to be spacers. Not sure what gemstones I will use at that point.

And now, I kind of want to do a witch’s ladder for all of the deities/spirits I work with currently. It would just be a nice devotional piece to honor them. So one for Sekhmet, Cernunnos, La Lupa, Medusa, and Circe. I am even kicking around the idea of doing one for Godzilla. He is currently chilling on the top part of the altar desk, and I have always viewed him as a type of guardian. So why not? ::chuckles:: That should keep me busy for a while, making all of these.

Better Day

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One of my rose canes, HEAVY with blossoms. And there are over fifty more blossoms not in this picture. ::smiles:: My lovely lady is really outdoing herself this blossoming round. I will have no problem harvesting enough roses on the next round to make some rose water for sure. ::smiles:: I am looking forward to that.

Man, I was in a foul ass head-space all day yesterday and most of today. I know it’s because I’m just super stressed about this final paper, but it doesn’t make it suck any less.
I did print out the papers I’ve written thus far for the class so I can knock this final paper out tomorrow. I’m super tactile in that regard and do better with the paper in my hands – all 36 pages total from three papers. I may have been wayyyyyyyy off in my assessment that the final paper will be 20-ish pages long. ::sighs::

Apparently there is a 10 day stretch this month that is the Greek Festival of Kallyntaria and Plynteria – days devoted to cleaning temples, sacred spaces, and altars. So I think that will be the perfect time to properly dedicate my new altar space. Gives me plenty of time between now and the 19th to physically clean my new altar and start figuring out where shit is gonna go. ::chuckles:: Note to Self: Festival of Kallyntaria and Plynteria is May 19th through May 28th. I need to put that on my calendar. It would be a good “new” tradition for me – a specific set of days to really clean, cleanse, and bless my altars and my room as well. Maybe the whole house, if I can swing it. Besides, my house could seriously stand to be smudged, blessed, and warded against fae and unwanted spirits again.

Honestly, I would love to get my hands on a metal detector and see if I can locate those railroad spikes. I want to make sure they are still in place. Maybe pull them up and see if the sigils need to be repainted or touched up. Maybe charge them up again and then place them back in the four corners of the property. But I’m not sure where I would get one…because, honestly, I would rather rent one and I have no idea where I would rent one.

Helpful

written: May 02

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Yeah, this is my husband being “helpful”. ::laughs:: That’s what I get for leaving my white board downstairs.

Today was our end of the year luncheon meeting. I hung out with Emily H and Kelly (don’t know her last name) – all introverts. Hurray! Hell, I don’t even want to talk about it. It was normal, luncheon thing.

Oh, one thing I did want to say, I HATE the fact that our Supervisors do videos and photos of us and put them up on the after school program’s Twitter, Facebook, and Instagram accounts without even asking us if we are ok with that.

Which, I know, sounds silly, given that I do have a Facebook account and my blog that I share photos of myself on. But it comes down to the issue of consent. The photos I share on my FB page and my blog are ones that I have CHOSEN to share. The ones the bosses take during our meetings? I have no idea what’s being posted until after it’s already posted and out there for the world to see. And I don’t feel like I can tell them not to do this, as they are pushing this whole “get outside of your comfort zone” and that we need to “rebrand” the after school program because so many people within the district don’t even fully understand what it is that we do. ::shakes her head:: So honestly, I would probably just get a lot of push back about me being a “party-pooper” and not wanting to be a team player and all that bullshit. And given that this will be my last year (hopefully), there’s no sense in rocking the boat at this point. But if I am back next year, I’m putting my foot down and saying something about it. I’ll push back, because I’m not the only one that feels that way.

Blah, don’t mind me. I’m just in a super shitty mood right now.

Godzilla

written: May 01

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LOOK AT WHAT MY HUSBAND BOUGHT ME LAST NIGHT!!!!!!!

So we went to Wal-Mart to pick up some things for his coworker John. Apparently John had a EPICALLY shitty birthday (his grandmother, who lived with him, died suddenly), and David told him screw the actual birth DAY, just celebrate it when he can, the way he wants to. And so we ended up at Wal-Mart at 10 pm, picking up things to make John’s birthday better. We ended up with a Minion’s birthday card, that when you open it, it plays the Minion’s singing what I assume to be “Happy Birthday” in Minion-talk. ::laughs:: I found that gem. And David picked up a stuffed dog for John and a hot wheels version of the Batmobile. ::chuckles:: And we saw the Godzilla, so of course I picked it up. David ended up buying it for me when he saw how giddy happy I was to have it. ::chuckles:: I seriously have a truly amazing husband.

So yeah, I was a shitty employee today and took the day off. Fuck it, I needed a mental break from the kiddos’ insanity AND I needed to work on my final assignments. I got the final paper written for the Practicum class AND turned it in, so that class is now 100% officially done. I got to looking at the final paper for the Resource Management class. Fuck me, that bitch is going to be a good 20 plus pages long. Shoot me now! BUT, at least it brings together everything I have covered in my previous papers, so I am expected to pull the bulk of the info from those – so the bulk of the leg work is already done. But, I HATED writing those damn papers and I have ZERO desire to go back over them and rewrite them. ::dramatic sigh:: But I will do it because I’ve got to pass this damn class. And yes, I did the math and I have to pull at least a C on this paper to keep a B overall in the class. ::chuckles::

Oh, and I had the most VIVID and AWESOME Walpurgis Night based dream last night. Walpurgis Night occurs the night before May Day, also called Beltane. It’s a night when Witches travel the country side, there are tons of bonfires, and then leads into Beltane. It’s less sex based and more Witch power based (in my opinion). And the dream fit into that so beautifully. I’m still mulling it over and turning key points over in my head. It’s one of those dreams that dominated the entire night, that everything fit into the core story line, and that I woke up KNOWING I had talked to a god (and yes, a MALE deity at that).

P.S. Godzilla isn’t “that” big. It’s a lovely “forced perspective” shot. He’s about a foot tall and almost two feet long.

Walpurgis Night

written: April 30

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Josey pup, demonstrating her NEED for a better couch so she can watch the resident rabbits out the window in better comfort.

I mean, look at this pitiful face! How can you tell her that no, she does NOT need a new couch? ::laughs::



Todd (a former student) stopped by to visit and hang out. And do this apparently:



Yeah, never a dull day when Todd comes to visit. ::laughs::

Final day of April. Tonight is Walpurgis Night – Witches’ night in Germany. It’s the night before Beltane (or May Day, whatever you choose to call it). And honestly, I kind of like the “darker” feel of Walpurgis Night as opposed to the over sexual-saturated Beltane.

I dunno, I’m beginning to suspect that maybe I’m a bit Asexual now? It’s been ages since I’ve had sex and masturbation as really dropped off as well. But I do enjoy watching NICE porn (where it at least appears that the woman is enjoying herself), so I can’t be fully Ace, right? Shit if I know. Maybe I just am too damn stressed and grumpy with myself (physically) for me to even be sexually turned on at this point?

The plan at this point is once the damn semester is over and I have my mornings back 100% MINE, I will start using the elliptical and walking Josey on the days that it’s not raining. I do hope to get into Krava Maga around my birthday, but I have to get my cardio up so I’m not just sucking wind the entire time I’m paying for the damn class.

Man, more and more, I am understanding 2007 Britney Spears, when she was under so much stress that she just up and shaved her head. I am seriously close to taking my husband’s clippers to my own head.