Tuesday, September 19, 2017

Contemplating

written: Sept 18th

Photo for today:
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My dorky lil pup. I adore her under bite…and I adore the fact that most of the time, her lip gets caught on it, and she’s fucking adorable.

I am thinking of doing a big hair cut at the end of the month. I am toying with the idea of cutting off 8 to 10 inches. I am also toying with the idea of omber-ing my hair with blonde. Could be fun. ::chuckles:: I guess I’ll cut it first and then figure out if I want the blonde or not.

It’s been a while since I’ve done a cut of that significance. Years, even. This time around, I will be sure to have Tracy take before and after photos. A lot of my personal identity is tied up in my hair. It’s one of my best assets, so cutting it isn’t something I take lightly.

Hazel has invited me out in October to one of the Heathen group’s rituals – a Wild Hunt ritual. I’m rather excited as I’ve never A) been to a Wild Hunt ritual, and B) never been to a Heathen (Germanic) ritual. So that should be interesting.

I need to get cracking on planning for Mabon. It’s on Friday, so yeah, it’s getting close. I plan to cut some of the roses from the bush out back and have those on my altar. I was hoping for acorns, but I’m not sure they’ll be ready by that time. I may push my celebration back to the following Monday. ::shrugs:: Will play that one by ear.

And after that is Samhain. I need to get started on that one as well. I want to print out my Family Tree again. I’m not sure I’ll drum through all the names like I did last year, but I like having the Family Tree up for that. And I’ll keep it up until December for sure. I’m hoping once Winter Break arrives and my Archives & Manuscripts class is over, I can devote some serious time to turning a critical eye to my Family Tree. I know there are errors in there. I just have to have it all up on the wall so I can visually see where the errors are. Then I’ll know which “ancestors” need a double checking. And I plan to cull out the Family Tree a bit as well. It’s beyond too large to manage, going waaaaaaaaaay out for crazy distant “relatives”. The Tree currently has 9,204 individuals on it. ::shakes her head::

Blankies, Candles, and Archives

written: Sept 18th

Photo for today:

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Josey is REALLY hoping I won’t take her “mini-blankie” – the scrap of tiger print blanket beside her. The blanket is in her kennel, and it is a seriously mangled/loved blanket. ::laughs:: She’s only allowed to destroy the blankets in her kennel (mostly because we aren’t here to keep her from destroying them), and thus leaves all the other blankets in the house alone. ::chuckles::

So Wal-Mart now has Yankee Candles. So dangerous. ::chuckles:: I did pick up a candle, not Yankee, but cinnamon scented in a nice red candle holder. Once the candle burns down completely, I plan to make my own candle in that candle holder. You know, whenever I finally capture this mythical thing called “free time”. ::chuckles::

Today was all about the reading. I had to read for my Archives & Manuscripts class. Note to Self: Stop making shit extra hard for this class. I hunted and hunted through the online university’s library for this one particular article that I HAD to have for class, to no avail. Finally, I just typed the article’s full title into Google, and BAM. There it was, in its entirety! Like, for fuck’s sake, girl! I’ll just start Googling this shit and be done with my university’s difficult library search. And damn, did that turn out to be an INTERESTING article to read!

Ok, so I admit, my opinions on things that are interesting to read, may not be everyone else’s jam. This particular article “The Archival Sliver: Power, Memory, & Archives in South Africa” by Verne Harris was all about the apartheid in South African, and how that racism/classism pervaded every aspect of their society…including the archives. And how the archives, based on what records (information) they kept and what they destroyed, helped shape and bolster the social memory/narrative, thus bolstering the racism/classism that made up apartheid. And I can see it mirrored in so many other places. Like, damn White People!?! Why are we such DICKS?!?! ::shakes her head:: Yay arrogance!

And to leave this entry on a positive note, damn, I love these Texas sunsets:

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Flowers, Feathers, and Movies

written: Sept 16th

Photo for today:


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It’s another, more artistic, photo of the blooming hibiscus. I love it. You can even see pollen. Who would have thought I would enjoy a PINK flower so much? ::laughs::

Found this woodpecker feather on my walk with Josey too:

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Busy, busy day. Fed Leviathan (my corn snake). I figure since the mice are so small, I’ll bump her feeding schedule up to every two weeks instead of every three and see how she does. I like the individual packing of the mice-in-a-box I got from PetsMart. The mice keep better and longer in the freezer instead of the 3-pack I get from PetCo. It’s just that the mice from PetCo are bigger. Note: Said mice are frozen. I’m not keeping live mice.

David and I watched Crimson Peak. I enjoyed it. It reminded me a bit of The Haunting in the beginning. Crimson Peak had some creepy moments, but I wish it had MORE creepy moments. It had such potential, but it just kind of flopped at the end. ::shrugs:: But all in all, a good movie, just not one that I’ll be re-watching any time soon. Then, because it was midnight, and we had just watched a creepy movie, Husband decided we needed to watch Jack The Giant Killer. ::chuckles:: So yeah, I didn’t head to bed until 3 am.

Saturday, September 16, 2017

Roses

written: Sept 15th

Photo for today:

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My rosebush is entering its third blooming cycle. I finally treated it a few weeks back for the rust and spots, and she seems mighty happy now. ::chuckles:: Seems I will have roses on my Mabon altar for sure. She has a dozen or more rose buds coming up.

It’s amazing how much stress I’ve shed by dropping that one class. Like I can breathe again, and joke around with my students. Hell, I was downright jolly at work. ::laughs:: Didn’t stop me from busting Jesse’s chops of a few things and putting my staff through their paces on documentation. But I have HOPE. I feel like I CAN turn this ship around on my campus. I CAN make my aides even better and thus make our work environment better.

So I have two assignments for the Archives class due – my 200 essay on this week’s readings is due Sunday, and a 2-page paper over some archives in the news is due on Monday. I’ve already found the article I’ll be writing over. Now I just have to read it, take notes, and answer the questions the professor has posed and limit that to just 2 pages. ::chuckles::

October brings around another Round of the National Journal Writing Month Challenge. I figure I’ll do that again for sure. And I’m hoping that there will be a new set of Witch photo prompts, like the “Inner Witch October Photo Challenge” #innerwitchoctober that I did last year. But if not, I’ll do that one again. It would be interesting to see how my practice has changed and how my interpretation of the prompts change. ::chuckles::

Thankful Thursday #37

written: Sept 14th

Photo for today:
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The neighborhood hibiscus is blooming again.

I am thankful…
1. That I was able to drop the Public Libraries class. The course load was just too much for me to be able to do at this time. It’s funny, but everyone is telling me to just not take that class again (it is not a required class), and yet, I kind of want to. I see it as a huge challenge, but one that would prove beneficial if I could take it and pass it. I will see how I feel about it further down the road.
2. Tomorrow’s paycheck is a REALLY nice one. Thank goodness, because I got bills to pay and I need to put back the money in savings that I had to take out to cover summertime bills.
3. Finding little tricks that keep my journal writing on target – from the sticky notes for the daily gratitude lists, to using the free planners to keep up with my 10-year journal. I like figuring simple fixes like this.
4. Albert, the resident cottontail rabbit, that has been frequenting our yard recently.
5. A good week celebrating David’s birthday. We celebrate in small ways all week long. Makes you feel a little extra special.
6. That FaceBook showed me photos from previous years on David’s birthday, which reminded me to hang the various “Happy Birthday” banners, like I have for multiple years now. David really liked that.
7. That the new system for checking the students in and out (ProCare) is back to working like it should, and that we’ve got the vast majority of the parents signed up correctly, so it’s a fairly streamlined deal now.
8. That I have come to the realization that I’m a very negative person at work. I’m grateful for that realization, because now I can begin the work to rectify that. I have no desire to be that person any longer.
9. The ability to purchase various things that I need and things I want with relative ease. And that I have the ability to shop around and find the quality, quantity, and price I want.
10. Using my good camera again. I had forgotten the joy of just taking it out and shooting photos, and how good they turn out without any major post-shoot work. I need to make more time for that love.

Wednesday, September 13, 2017

Feathers & Retreat

Photo for today:

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Pair of feathers I found on my walk today with Josey. Cardinal feather on the left. Unknown black feather on the right – most likely a Grackle. Lord knows we have a shit ton of those around here. Too small to be a Crow, or else I would have kept it.

Holy fuck, I’m so completely beat down and worn out. I almost burst into tears at work, dealing with those shenanigans and thinking about all the classwork I STILL have to do. So I’ve decided I’m going to try to drop my Public Libraries class. It’s just too much to take on right now with everything else that’s going on in life as well. Sadly, the last day to just straight up drop the class was Monday. Now, I can drop it, but I’ll get a penalty. But you know what? The penalty is worth it if I can keep my job, pull an A in the Archives & Manuscripts class, and NOT end up committed or haven’t done any self-injurious behavior, or had a psychotic snap. THAT is what the penalty will keep at bay right now. I do plan to take the Public Libraries class before the end of my Master’s degree, but most likely it will be my last semester, so I only have to focus on that one class, plus working in a public library (which will GREATLY help me in that class). So yeah, it will push my graduation back a semester, but if it keeps me out of the rubber room? WORTH IT.

Now I’ll have to pay back that class to my Mom. She’s graciously paid for my classes as long as I get B’s or better. Hopefully, I will get some of the money back from dropping this course. But even if I don’t, I intend to pay my mom back every penny for this class.

It hurts to admit that I’ve truly bitten off more than I can chew. It really hurts to admit that I’m not strong enough mentally, right now, to take on this class with the way everything else is going. It just really fucking hurts. But I keep telling myself, this is NOT me quitting. I will tackle this class another time, when I know I can win. And I will get a goddamn A in the fucking class.

Birthday

written:  Sept 12th

Photo for today:
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One of Frank’s little babies, chillin’ in Holly’s memorial crepe myrtle tree.

Today is David’s birthday. I took the day off of work. I just couldn’t go in to work today. I needed the day off. We did lunch at Bacci’s. And we finally swung by Marble Slab. We’ve been toying with going there for a while now and we finally went. Super delicious, but holy crap, expensive!

I am still trying to get all the reading done for my Public Libraries class. ::shakes her head:: Even with as fast a reader as I am, and as much as I love to read….I don’t think I can keep up with this class. I swear, it is going to require 25 hours a week, minimum, just for this one class. And I still have my Archives & Manuscripts class, PLUS work and then family life. There just aren’t that many hours in the damn day. How to people work full time, go to grad school full time, and have families with children AND still remain sane? I tip my hat to those people, because y’all are on deity level there.