Shit Day

written: June 27

Photo 88/1001



Cute little Koala bear I drew on a sticky note pad on Jennifer’s desk. I was so damn bored there in the back for about two hours. They needed me to cover the back (where people come to drop off their iPads and laptops to get repaired, or to turn them in if they are leaving the district), because there was a funeral today for one of the Techs who passed away suddenly last week.

Today was shit day to be honest.
One of the Techs that I kind-of-sort-of-knew-ish passed away suddenly last Thursday. Today was her funeral – which I didn’t go to but a lot of the Tech Department did. So when I got home today, I thought I would see if I could find her obituary. Instead, I came across the obit for one my former students.

It seriously hit me right in the gut and knocked all of the air out of my lungs. Christian was one of my favorites. He has his issues (as all of my favorites tend to), but it seemed like things were just starting to turn around for him. He had just graduated high school earlier this month and had decided on attending one of the local junior colleges. He had bad anxiety so him going to college was a big thing. The last thing he posted on his Facebook page was gushing about how inviting and warm the college was and how he was so excited about joining that community in the Fall. But he died in a car crash Sunday.

And so I posted on Facebook about being heartbroken and how much it sucks to be looking for a coworker’s obituary and instead find one for one of your students. And Paula, bless her fucking lil heart, commented something along the lines of “Ew.” I shit you not. And then went on to talk about how death is on the rise for the US due to all the stressors we’re currently under.

Which, let’s break this shit down real quick. What the FUCK would ever possess a person to write “Ew” on a post about the death of a student??????

As for the second part, ok, I didn’t come out and say the age of my student or any other identifying info, but what the fuck? I’m sure death from chronic illnesses, stress related illnesses, and mental illnesses are certainly on the rise in our nation at the moment….but how the fuck does that have ONE GODDAMN THING to do with my post?

I was coming to my friends in Facebook for solace. I had tears rolling down my face. And this is the shit she posts? Like are you for fucking real? And this isn’t the first time she’s gone off on some wild direction, vastly different from what I needed. I just wanted to call her and scream at her on the phone about her fucking insensitive comment. And it just boggles my mind, because most of the time, she’s SUPER sensitive to these things.

I just don’t know where this is coming from with her. She works the same after school program I do (she’s a sub, so she goes to a lot of different campuses). And she’s really good at her job. But that fucking comment? Christ, if she had done that in person, I would have probably backhanded her before I even realized I had moved.

And what shocks me is how similar Paula and I are on a lot of things, and yet she was beyond insensitive on this. And then Keith pops up saying how I look like the new Bachelorette and we start our standard banter of him telling me I’m hot and me trying to get him to bring me the Bachelorette for some fun. And at the end of it, before he heads to bed, he’s like “I hope I made you smile after getting such crappy news today.” And we are polar opposites on a lot of shit politically…and yet, he knew I was hurting and found a way to cheer me up for a bit. And that’s a true friend. Well, a true friend probably wouldn’t be constantly joking about trying to sleep with me. But that’s just the weird, unique friendship Keith and I have.

And yes, Keith and I dated way back in the day. We’ve been friend since 2000? 2001? We LARPed together (Live Action Role Playing) since then. We’ve been lovers (honestly, he was one of the shittiest lays) way back when. I’m married. He’s been married, divorced, married again with a kiddo now. So it’s not like anything will ever happen. Even if we were both single. I’m seriously about him being a shitty lover. ::laughs:: My nickname for him (that he didn’t know about) was the jackhammer because that’s what he did for about 8 minutes and nothing else. ::cackles::