Rattling Around

written: October 29th

Photo for today:

 

Adorable lil Miss Josey, enjoying some sunshine time. I am loving this cooler weather we’ve been having.

After searching for a year or so, looking at thousands of wands….I think I may have found mine. And for a pretty damn good price – especially considering the price tags I’ve seen on the ones I’ve desired. I’m waiting a full 24 hours before purchasing it – just to make sure that gut reaction to the wand is authentic and not just spur of the moment. But I’m actually giddy on the inside about it. I just hope it’s still there tomorrow. A full 24 hours.

So I had a nice quiet day at the house. David is working the new weekend schedule. Instead of working a full day on Sunday, he worked 4 hours yesterday and 4 hours today. I like it because it almost feels like I have the whole weekend to myself…and yet I do still have plenty of hang-out time with my husband. Win-win. ::chuckles:: And it happens every other month, which is nice as well, instead of him losing a full Sunday every three weeks.

MoonTime has arrived…well technically not quite yet. But it will be here by midnight for sure. I started using the Goddess Flow Oil (from Sage Goddess) right now, hopefully to soften the cramps that I know are coming for me soon. Just got to make it through the first 48 hours and then I’m fine. Just sucks that I can’t stay a home, sitting in a hot shower, devouring Cheetos and ice cream and cat napping as I need. ::chuckles::

Samhain is drawing close. Just a few days to finish setting up my Samhain altar. I need to pick up food offerings and pomegranate juice for ritual as well. Seeing as how David has October 31st off of work, and thus will be home…I will be doing my Samhain ritual on November 1st instead. But that seems to be my standard modus operandi.

We are watching a series on Netflix called Zoo. The main scientist, Mitch, looks a lot like my dad. And Mitch is a shitty dad, just like mine. And yeah, it’s been a little rough watching it – seeing Mitch’s side of the whole situation. Mitch didn’t make any apologies for his behavior…he knew he was a shitty ass father. But I can kind of see things from his perspective.

It doesn’t excuse the fact at all that my father elected OUT of my and my brother’s lives. It doesn’t excuse it at all and it sure as shit doesn’t take away the pain that created. But at least, I am now at a point when I can think of him, and it isn’t blinding hatred for him. Hell, it only took me 17 years to get this point. Who knows? Maybe in another 17 years, I might be on the cusp of forgiveness. And maybe 17 years after that, I will be at the point of willing to tell him about said forgiveness. But I sure as shit am not holding my breath. ::chuckles toothily::