A Good-Bye

Now, I’m not claiming to be anywhere on the spectrum of normal behavior when it comes to typical human behavior. Honestly, most of it baffles the shit out of me.

Like, I understand grief is a very personal behavior. I get that. I know that no everyone grieves the same way.

Danny, a high school buddy of mine, died on Dec 9th. And while I understand why people post things to his Facebook wall (it’s a memorial page at this point), I don’t understand whomever has his password, and is posting using his account now.

I’m sure it’s a close friend or a family member. But it un-nerves the shit out of me to see his name pop up in my news feed. I get all excited because it’s Danny....and then I remember....he’s dead. So, for me, it’s like getting that sucker punch to the gut all over again.

While it’s not like whomever is posting using Danny’s account is trying to act like Danny’s the one writing the posts. I would hunt them down and beat their ass for that shit. But they’re posting stuff like “We miss you everyday! The memories we have of you keep us going!”

Like, why the fuck do you have to use HIS profile to post this stuff so it shows up in everyone’s feed? If you feel the need to say this, just use your own damn account and post it to his wall.

To me, it just smacks of attention-seeking behavior. Like, “let me broadcast this to the whole world, so I can prove what a good friend/family member I am.”

So, here I am, shedding tears as I “unfriend” my dead friend.

My strong inner core self wants to say something…to speak up about this and how it makes me feel.
But how to do that and NOT be an asshole? That’s just beyond my reach right now. So instead, I’ll “unfriend” him.

The whole situation just sucks.

Danny, I know we haven’t been all that close since Jeremy and I broke up....but damn man. I miss ya and your crazy antics. I miss dancing with you and hitting on girls with you. I miss my Paco so much.

And because of that, I can’t handle it when your name and face pop up in my newsfeed on Facebook. One of your loved ones has pirated your profile and are using it to air out their grief, and while I certainly don’t hold that against them....I just can’t handle it man. So I’m cutting that last tie…