The "friend" who made the comment, hoping that whatever I was doing, I wasn't opening myself up to demonic influences in regards to a post I made about finally being called upon by a god....she's an on-line buddy. And not even a close one at that. So honestly, I don't give two shits about her opinion.
And given that I've been Wiccan/Pagan/Heathen for 18 years, down here in the good ole South (read BIBLE BELT), you would think I would be used to this by now. At least she was expressing concern instead of just outright damning my soul to hell. She really was rather polite about it (I've certainly had worse happen), but still, I don't like being "worried" over that I'm playing with demons.
How can the natural world be anything but Divine?
I took a walk tonight, totally on a whim, at 9:45 pm. I felt the pull and I went with it, just like I felt the pull of the god and went with that. And, like the pull of the god, this pull turned out to be exactly what I needed.
I've been brooding over various things (aka MONEY) and decided to take a walk with Holly (gotta have a large black dog that looks menacing for me to walk around here alone, after dark). Part of it too, was to take back some power. See, last night David and I were watching the tv series Numb3rs and it was an episode on sexual assault -- namely the women went with a cop, who they thought they could trust, and he drugged and raped them. It ran some serious parallels to my own rape (thought I could trust the guy but ended up drugged and raped) and it opened up some wounds that I thought had healed over, but obviously hadn't. So part of it was to get out there and take back the power I'd lost.
And man, did the walk do me wonders.
First came upon one of our local cottontail rabbits.
Rabbit is the totem of fear....healthy fear that keeps you safe and keeps you out of danger....though, if left unchecked, it can swing over into the damaging aspect of paranoia and crippling fears. Something I was struggling with.
Next up came all the frogs, happily singing out their love songs.
Frog symbolizes metamorphosis and of coming into your own personal power. Definitely on the right path.
And then, I came across a feather in the dark.
A battered and very worn Great Horned Owl feather.
Owl's power is the ability to see in the dark...to peer into the yawning abyss and know that at the end of it is not death, simply transformation. Owl teaches you to pay attention to that little voice of intuition (which I've been doing more of lately already).
And I heard Kernunnos whisper in my ear, "Yes the feather is battered and scarred, but that does not take away from its innate beauty and certainly does not take away from the strength and magnificence of the bird that left it behind. Just as your scars and imperfections do not limit you, unless you allow them to."
So the feather is currently sitting upon my altar, a place of honor. I've lit incense and made my thanks to the Goddess, the God, and Owl for these gifts of wisdom.
I feel my soul uncurling inside and filling up every part of my body once more.
How can this be evil?
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