Hard Talks

I had a completely different blog post in mind (started this on September 11th), but then I read this news article about how 4 Houston cops have been fired due to them shooting a man TWENTY-ONE times on the GROUND who was having a mental crisis. That hits too close to home on so many levels.

I’ve had the Hard Talk with my husband about my own mental health struggles. That if things get bad, to please, please, please, do NOT call the cops. Because chances are, getting cops involved will wind up getting me seriously hurt and/or killed. And that’s exactly what happened to Nicolas Chavez. He was having a mental crisis (suicidal behavior), and officers were called because he was running in the streets and had a piece of metal he was cutting himself with.

Yeah, I made the mistake of watching the news clip of the whole situation, which didn’t show the extremely graphic parts. But it showed more than enough. And that sent me into a really bad mental space, that I’m just now clawing my way out of.

This shit legit scares me. because that’s the same manner my “insanity” tends to manifest.

I posted the following (along with the link to the news article) on my Facebook page:

This is why I have the hard talks with my husband about what to do and what NOT to do; who to call and who NOT to call if I ever become mentally unstable.

Because, let’s face it, with my brain chemistry, it’s just a matter of WHEN. Not IF. WHEN I will have a break-down.

I’ve told him, please, for the love of god, do NOT call the police.
And this article demonstrates why. Plus there’s the one where the officers were called to help a woman with her autistic son in Utah and they shot him as well. I think the kid is alive?

But yeah, this just reminds me that I really need to put together a list of contact information for Mental Health resources for the area to have on hand, should we ever have the need for it.

I’ve already told my husband that I will talk to him if I start seeing signs of me going down that path. And I have a number of friends that I can reach out to as well. I’ve also promised my husband that if I’m starting down that path, that I would bring him the handgun I have in my room, just in case. I don’t think I would ever use a gun to commit suicide, but I’d rather not run that risk.