Scheming

Early next week, I'll schedule my test for my teaching certificate for the end of the month.  I'm scared as hell.  What the fuck do I know about teaching in a classroom?

Sure, I've got 17 years experience working with kids, but that has almost all been in a day care setting.  And the classroom teaching experience I do have, is in Montessori education, which is nothing like public school.  I'm so scared that I'm going to totally suck at it.

David's job is totally sucking the life out of him, and he desperately wants a new career path.  He's looking into being a physical therapist assistant.  He'd have to do 2 years in a program before he could do that, and we just can't afford to do that unless I'm teaching.

Everywhere I turn, it leads me back to teaching and I am really chafing under that.  I hate being forced to do something.  And my knee jerk reaction is to run as hard and as fast as I can in the opposite direction.  But I can't really do that any more.

In good news, my debt in the debt consolidation program is getting low.  Only two balances left.  One at $800 and the other at $3400.  I know that sounds like a lot, but considering that I started out the program with $15,000 with them, I am doing great.  Once the summer hits, I'll add my last credit card to the program and get rid of it too.  How nice it will be not to have debt hanging over my head.  I'll have a credit card in the end, but only use it for gas and pay it off at the end of each month to up my credit score.  Then hopefully, David and I can begin seriously look for a house.

Our next door neighbors are thumping on the walls in the night.  I hate it because it's loud enough that I wake up in fight-or-flight mode, which makes it damn near impossible to fall back asleep immediately.  With  my heart racing and my mind in attack mode, it takes a while to calm my body down enough to fall back asleep.  Fucking assholes.  I've called the apartment office and filed a complaint, asking them to speak with my neighbors about this, but it doesn't seem to have made a difference.  I've started pounding on the walls in return, each time they do it first, and that seems to have culled it a bit.  But it still happens from time to time, so I'll just keep pounding until they finally get the message.  I mean, how hard is it to be CONSIDERATE?  *shakes her head*

I know getting a house won't magically make the world a better place.  We could have terrible neighbors there too.  But at least I won't be sharing a fucking wall with them.  And I plan to make cookies or something to share with the neighbors when we get a house, to start everything off on the right foot.  I'll be all sorts of kind and considerate and friendly to hopefully get the same in return.