I’m currently working on my upcoming birthday goals. Trying to keep them reasonable, but still a few to push me outside my comfort zone. Also hashing out a 101 goals in 1001 days as well. Sometimes, I just need things to look forward to. Things to hope and strive for.
September 30th marked my 14th wedding anniversary. Fourteen years married, 16 years TOTAL together. Just crazy, when you think about it. I cannot believe it’s been 14 years since we got hitched in Vegas. ::chuckles:: I’m currently working towards getting us back to Vegas for our 15th anniversary.
I know I will kick myself later on down the road about not writing more about TMS, but man, it’s a game changer for me. I am having to come to terms with somethings about myself. But it’s easier now. Like, I have the motivation and the ENERGY to actually DO things.
I’ve been decluttering my room. It honestly, has just been a dumping ground for everything over the past couple of years. And I know that’s a major reflection of how my mental health was taking such a massive ass beating. And I didn’t even realize how BAD it was. But looking at all the useless SHIT I have in my room now? Yeah, it was bad. BUT, this gives me a marker to use in the future. If I just start piling things up and not even LOOKING at what I’ve purchased? Then I need to stop and really, REALLY check in with myself.
I need to revamp the affirmations I do. I have the ones from my TMS sessions taped up on my bathroom mirror so I can see them every day. And somedays, I go ahead and read each one out loud to myself before I go to work. But, most of them no longer resonate with me. And I think 15 affirmations is just too much as well. So, I need to figure out what I want there instead.
I’ve also taken to reading my Spirit Companions’ names out loud. Usually, I do this as a part of my winding down, getting ready for bed routine. I just have so many at this point, that I kind of forget who is who. So I have their names, plus their species written down on a piece of paper that is also tapped to my bathroom mirror (it’s a huge mirror). I have a white 7-day candle in there that I’ll also light while reading the names, as a small offering to them all.
Work is still work. ::shrugs:: But I don’t foresee that changing anytime soon. I just don’t require self validation from my job. It’s my job, not what I’m deriving my sense of self-worth from. I’m still hoping that a position opens up at the library in my town. That’s the IDEAL job at this point, as it would be a 5-minute drive TOPS to get there from my house. ::chuckles:: Lort, that would be AMAZING.
Other than that….hurray for official spooky season!
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