Babysitting Ramblings

Babysitting for the Robinsons. I really need to ask for more information as to what all it will entail. I’m babysitting just the young boy for most of the evening. They’re taking the daughter and some of her friends out to dinner and then to play at Dave & Busters. I’ll be here until 10 pm or so. I wasn’t planning on staying that late, but I certainly will like the money. $20 will go to pay for getting my eyebrows waxed on Monday – gotta look good on my birthday. The rest will go toward paying off the last $300 left on my drum. After using my little red drum for my Samhain ritual, I definitely want a drum with a deeper voice. I also need to go to some drum circles to learn how to drum better. I definitely want to use my drum(s) more in my personal ceremonies.

I need to figure out when I am going to meet up with Long Fang. He has a walking stick that would make a great staff. Hopefully I can snag it over Thanksgiving Break.

I am so ready for Winter Break! I’m really looking forward to the school semester to be over AND to have a break from work as well.

I so so stressed out over all of this. I am having to fight to impulse to cut daily. I am not sure I’ll make it through the end of the semester without cutting unless I find another way to deal with my stresses.

I’m just ready to be done with the degree and thus the after school program. I am really struggling with Gail as my new supervisor. We don’t seem to be communicating very well. And I’m so defensive now. It’s a knee-jerk reaction now and I hate that.

After the whole fiasco with Chelsea, followed by Spencer, I have zero confidence in my superiors. And my super negative attitude is spilling over onto my staff. And that’s making ME a shitty manager. Guess I need to focus on me and let the rest of it fall to the wayside.

Besides, I’m pretty sure my evaluation this time around is going to be pretty crappy. So I might as well accept that, not worry about it, and instead focus on doing a better job for my aides and my students.