Hope

written: November 02

Photo 216/1001

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My tarot/oracle reading for Samhain that I did today. I felt like Samhain proper (October 31st) was for the Beloved Dead and thus held off until today to do anything for myself. I don’t know why I was so shocked at how accurate the Jade Oracle reading was – it always is. ALWAYS. And damn, this deck doesn’t pull any punches. ::chuckles:: I am so thankful I randomly stumbled across this deck while looking at The Last Unicorn Tarot (STILL waiting for that deck to be printed and shipped), because this is my total go-to deck since I’ve gotten it. It’s not as brutally honest as a Tarot deck is…but at the same time, there’s a bit more edge to it than you standard Oracle deck. It’s a nice blend of the two.

So I had my appointment with Dr. O. today about getting on some anti-depressants. It’s always so much fun to run through all medications I’ve tried and why they didn’t work out. She’s putting me on Pristiq – turns out, the generic of it is a ZERO cost drug for me. My health insurance doesn’t pay shit for doctor visits (this visit cost me $120), but damn it does very well on prescription medication. So at least I’m only get the shaft on one item. I have a follow up visit with her at the end of the month to see how it’s going and if we need to supplement this medication with Wellbutrin. I’m setting my intention right now that Pristiq WILL work for me. Trying so hard to stay positive here.

Annie messaged me to give me a heads up that the On-Line Friend that I had blocked last month has finally figured out that she’s been blocked. ::chuckles:: And apparently On-Line Friend is saying she has no reason why I would block her, that obviously I’m over-reacting to something, and is begging people to talk to me on her behalf. ::shakes her head:: I really wish people would come with appropriate warning labels. How do I manage to consistently attract the crazies? And it’s not even like On-Line Friend was even NICE to me, so why is she so desperate to get me back as a friend? Guess she’s missing her favorite verbal punching bag. ::shakes her head:: Yeah, I just hope she accepts this and moves on to someone new.