Border-Line Obsessive...

For the past few months now, I’ve been dreaming of my First Crush at least once a week.

And I friggin’ hate it now. I mean, what’s the point? Nothing ever happened between us. I was too chicken shit to say anything. Beyond terrified of rejection, not to mention reject by my First Real Crush.

I’m talking, heart-sick level crushing. Border-line obsessive.

And this was back in middle school and high school. AGES ago. I haven’t even seen him since I left my lil hometown to go to college in The Big City. So we are talking going on 20+ YEARS here. So why the fuck is he constantly walking in my goddamn dreams?

Well, I mean, I’d rather have him in my dreams than psycho-ex, so I guess there’s that benefit.

But it does NOTHING but bring up all that unrequited love feelings.

I will admit, a while back, I did find his wife’s FaceBook profile and scoured through their photos until I could find ones of him. And lemme tell you, he has changed a LOT. But I could immediately tell it was him. (I did mention the border-line obsessive, right?). I ended up blocking her account JUST so I wouldn’t continue to essentially STALK him. ::sighs::

Sometimes it seriously sucks being a friggin’ Scorpio.