Changes

Of course, once I wrote that beautiful entry about switching from hiding/protection over to blooming/beauty, life threw me a curve ball and I fell completely off that.  ::laughs::  Oh well.  Life is never boring.

I am electing to take a bit more charge of the things I can control in my life.  To focus my energies there…to transform them from merely surviving to thriving.  Things out of my control?  Well, hopefully by better tuning the things IN my control, I can better handle those curve balls.  Or at least, that is my hope!  ::laughs::

I’ve decided to scrap the current physical journal I’m keeping.  I’ve missed more days than I’ve written.  And I’ve placed way too much importance on writing in it every single day.  And it just bums me out now.  Instead, beginning in July, I’ll just journal straight into my Bullet Journal.  I already have the habit of writing daily work notes and to do things in it, so journaling should be easier to incorporate.  And I’m taking the “must journal every day” pressure and throwing it out the damn window.  I’m not sure WHY I placed that pressure on myself, but I’m kicking that bullshit to the curb.  ::chuckles::

I’ve actually been doing some work on my outstanding Coven homework.  I’m not sure what the writer’s block was on it, but I’m banging that out like nobody’s business now.  ::smiles::  Actually feeling pretty damn proud of that.  And my High Priestess mentioned how she always wishes she could publish a book with all the various spells the Coven mates have to create as part of our various homework assignments because we are all so incredibly creative.  And that gave me the idea to have all of my Dedicant Year of classes and homework spiral bound together at some office supply store at some point.  It would be nice to just have it all together in one place.  And then I could get all of my 1^st Year classes and homework done the same way, once I’ve completed it.  I’m no longer lying to myself, saying I’ll get it all handwritten in a journal “someday”.  I know it’s not going to happen, and that’s ok.  It doesn’t have to.  The spiral bound will be just fine.  Besides, just because I’ve written the spells for my homework, doesn’t mean I’ve actually used them…so I don’t necessarily want them in my working grimoire.

Speaking of which, I’ve been working on that as well.  I’m currently SLOWLY working on documenting all of my crystal hoard.  Which, holy shit.  Nothing makes you realize how much of a crystal hoard you have until you are having to document them all.  ::laughs::  So yeah, that’s my current big project I’m tackling for my grimoire. 

I noticed that I was just writing list after list after list of things I wanted to put into my grimoire as a way to procrastinate actually working IN the grimoire.  So I’ve taken the plunge…kind of.  ::laughs::  I’m taking notes in a composition notebook, that I’m also doing my Coven homework in.  Once I get all the crystal notes down, then I’ll transfer that into the grimoire.  Then it will be on to herbs, or oils, or maybe my tools?  Who knows.  ::smiles::  But I’m enjoying the challenge.  Plus it gives me something to focus on.