Final Day

written: June 07

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A slab of petrified palm wood that belonged to my maternal grandmother.

I am thankful….
1. To have survived the final day of the school year and that my afterschool program is officially over until the school year starts back up in August.
2. Kick ass storm that blew through during the final hours of my afterschool program. I got soaked trying to get stuff out to my car, but so worth it.
3. Got everything squared away for my upcoming surgery. I have my fingers crossed that this procedure will be a resounding success and I won’t have to deal with periods anymore!
4. The new FB group is so much better than the previous drama-bomb group.
5. That my aide Anthony won’t be coming back next year. He’s going to college about four hours away, so he won’t be back. He started off pretty good, but turned into a total douche bag there towards the end. So no, I won’t miss him one bit.
6. Esmeralda, my supervisor, complimented me on my blue hair. ::laughs:: And here I thought I was being a rebel! Though, I’m sure she’d had a different response if this was the BEGINNING of the school year, instead of the end.
7. The new-to-me Honda Civic my mom gave me. She bought my late aunt’s car, gave me her car, and will be selling my old Honda Civic. This car has POWER LOCKS! Like, I can’t tell you how excited I am over that. ::laughs::
8. And that my mom covered the out-of-pocket, gotta-be-paid-up-front cost of my surgery that took us BOTH by surprise on Monday. Granted, it’s getting added to what I owe her for the class I had to drop a few semesters back, and I could have covered the cost, but it would have drained me significantly financially. So I am deeply grateful for her aid in that matter as well.
9. For the gratitude various parents and students expressed…especially those who will be going on to middle school next year. Working with children really can be quite a thankless job, so any gratitude shown is NEVER a wasted gesture.
10. A slight break in the triple digit temperatures. Man, I have a feeling this summer is going to be a brutal one.

End of Year Party Day

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Lovely little yellow flower (not a dandelion) framed nicely by a dead branch from a Douglas pear tree (complete rubbish tree as one of my neighbors learned when his massive one split completely off at the trunk during a rainstorm).

Today was a crazy ass day but it ended up being so much better than I thought it would be. We did our End of the Year party today at the after school program, so hopefully TOMORROW (last day of school!), the kiddos will elect to simply go home with their parents after their class parties and not come to the program at all. A handful of students I already know won’t be there tomorrow. I’m just hoping and praying and hoping some more that it will be like last year’s last day – where less than a third of my kiddos were at the program that day. Don’t get me wrong – I seriously do enjoy my students. But holy hell, can it be summer break yet?????

So Cici’s pizza and cinnamon rolls, plus soda and chips today. It’s crazy getting that all squared away for 66 students. But at the end of the day, it all went pretty smoothly and we didn’t get ANY pizza on the floor. That’s a miracle in and of itself. I think this is the first year that’s occurred. Yay!

Now tomorrow, we have two movies we are gonna put on for the kiddos. They can play in the gym or hang out in the cafeteria (watch the movie, draw/color, or play games). I have the bulk of the paperwork all alphabetized and sorted. I’ve printed out my mileage form and signed it. So all I have to do tomorrow is the final day’s paperwork, hang out with my kiddos one last time, and then gather up the computers and stuff and take it all to the main office after the last student leaves.

Tuesday Drama

written June 05

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CUPCAKES. The vanilla ones were TO DIE FOR. Soooooo good. And I’m proud of myself that I only ate one. ::chuckles::

So apparently Anthony, who was out on Friday because he has mono, came in yesterday even though his doctor’s note says he’s not cleared to come back to school/work until WEDNESDAY. Did he just infect my entire damn campus??? ::sighs:: I called Esmeralda about and I knew most likely we wouldn’t get a sub, but dude, it’s worth it to hopefully keep the rest of my staff from getting MONO. Fucking dumb ass.

I ended up leaving the Cauldron group. I watched Derrie’s poor-pitiful-me video that sorta/kinda apologized about LYING to and about various members for the sole purpose of stirring up drama….and then watched her turn it all around say how horrible a person she is and blah-blah-blah. Basically, turning it all back around to get people to feel sorry for her. Fuck that noise. And then she made a couple of posts about how she should just delete the group…basically fishing for people to beg her to keep the group going and assure her that she’s a good person. And just, fuck that noise. I was the fuck out of there. Tara (one of the former members of the Cauldron that I just ADORE) reached out and let me know some of them had gotten together and started their own lil Facebook group. Apparently a handful of people were inquiring about me by name, so she was asking if I would be interested in joining. I was hoping they had started another group because I was sad to lose them, so I happily said I would love to be a part of the group. And already, I can feel the difference. It feels so warm and inviting. I am still very much the black sheep of the group, being that I adhere to a lot of the Left-Hand Path philosophy, but I still feel welcomed and valued. It’s a really nice feeling.

Blind-Sided

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Dinner tonight. Man, I love the Zataran’s Blacked Chicken Alfredo. I get this amazing alfredo in less than 20 minutes.

Loooong day. I met with my gyno today to talk about my upcoming ablation procedure. And then I went over to the hospital to actually set up my surgery. And that’s when I got hit with a ton of bricks. My part of the surgery, payable to the HOSPITAL, is around $5,500. And this is SEPARATE from the $1,200 I owe my gyno and the anesthesiologist. ::sighs:: And yeah, they wanted me to pay a percentage of it before I have my surgery. IN A DAMN WEEK. Like, what the fuck?? ::grumbles::

But thank god that I have health insurance, because if I was paying the whole thing – we’re talking a little over $44,000. Yeah, I didn’t misplace a decimal there – $44k. Like more than DOUBLE what I make in a damn year. So I don’t even want to imagine how expensive a hysterectomy would be!

Apparently, a MASSIVE drama bomb went off in the Cauldron group on Facebook over the weekend. Mom’s internet is down, so my internet time was super limited, so I have no clue exactly went down. And honestly, I’m not even sure I care at this point. It’s not like this group has exactly enriched my life at all. I figure I’ll watch all the drama videos and then probably peace out.

Prank

written: June 03

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Fake snake I picked up at the dollar store that I’m going to use to prank Anthony (one of my aides). He’s been a bit of a turd lately, so I figured this would be a fun way to break the tension. ::chuckles:: And it’s just the right level of cruelty as well, which is always a bonus.

Feral

I just finished thumbing through Halloween: Customs, Recipes, and Spells by Silver RavenWolf. I wasn’t holding out a whole lot of hope, but damn, I thought I would get more out of the book than I did. ::shakes her head:: It’s a good book for the beginner witch that wishes to learn the back-story and lore of the evolution of Halloween as we know it. But for anyone that’s been actively practicing for a few years, most of the stuff I just wasn’t interested in at all. I only took ONE thing away from the whole book – a simple Samhain Protection Powder because it was simple and I already have like 80% of the ingredients. ::chuckles:: But it seems to be a cool little powder that I wouldn’t mind making up some to send out to friends as well.

I’m still plugging away at the book Wicca: Another Year and a Day by Timothy Roderick. I will say, I probably should have read the first book he wrote (Wicca: A Year and a Day) because he references it very heavily. But at least he has the bulk of his references listed in the back as Appendixes, so I’m not completely in the dark. And honestly, I’m just reading that one to see if there are any suggestions he makes that I would want to incorporate into my own practice.

But reading his book has made me realize that British Wicca (like the Gardnerian or Alexandrian Lineages) are not for me. I’m not all about the “thou” and “thee” and “knowest”, etc. I’m sure their rituals are beautiful and the poetry they speak has the ability to bring about major transformation. But, that just ain’t me. If I could figure out how to do an entire ritual with howls, growls, and yips, you get your ass, that’s the way I would do it. ::laughs:: I dunno – British Wicca just seems so…..refined and proper. And I’m just fully feral here. ::chuckles::

BUT, at least I’m figuring out what I am NOT interested in. Helps shuck away the unused parts so that I can hone down on the meat of my practice instead.

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A lovely feather gift from my pen-pal, Sorrow.

Pythia

written: June 01

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I FINALLY got my hands on a bottle of the Pythia perfume oil by Sage Goddess. I traded my bottle of Dragon perfume oil that I didn’t really care for. So really, it didn’t cost me anything other than shipping. It’s a much lighter, cleaner scent than I was anticipating. And it doesn’t have very long staying power. So this oil will most likely be regulated to ritual use only.

I have received so many compliments on my blue hair. Normally, I would want nothing more than to NOT stand out, but I’m loving this right now.

I buried the ash from last night’s ritual in my flower bed. As the flowers grow, so does the magic the sigil encompasses. I need to write it all down and get it into my damn, super-neglected Grimoire.

I also need to see if my mom still has her Kindle. If she does, and isn’t using it, I may see if she’ll let me have it. The local library has a ton of Pagan books available as eBooks and it would just be easier to read them on an actual Kindle instead of my cell phone. AND they have a bunch of beginner drawing books as well that I want to try my hand at this summer.